This subject of being afraid, feeling fearful, has come up a lot quite a few times in the last couple days. However, I don’t really think it’s fear people are feeling. When you start to shift who you are, your thoughts, your beliefs and how you perceive things it can start to feel unfamiliar. Often that unfamiliar feeling get’s categorized as fear.
The analogy I use is climbing a mountain. You climb and you climb and then you turn around and the view is different, you are higher and you can see more. You might feel a little shaky because what you’re seeing is different then the last time you turned around. It just takes a few minutes to adjust, to realize your feet are still underneath you and that you are on solid ground.
When you grow the same thing can happen. You look up, after being head down focused on growth and change, and the view is different because you are different. You might feel shaky until you realize you are on solid ground or until the new you feels familiar and normal. That happens with time.
You might have experienced this before. You might have even called it fear. To some extent that’s correct. You might feel the fear of the unknown, but more than likely you felt unfamiliarity. It’s easy to categorize the feeling of unfamiliarity as fear. I think you will be better served to recognize it as shakiness due to unfamiliarity.
Categorizing unfamiliarity as fear causes you to respond fearfully which activates the fight/flight/freeze part of your brain. You don’t move forward when you’re acting from fight/flight/freeze. You can’t. Your brain doesn’t work that way. When you experience fear, your brain is going to work to get you back to safety, which might mean taking you back to old familiar place you worked so hard to grow away from.
If you can recognize the shakiness as unfamiliarity then your brain can start adapting. You can start to become familiar with the unfamiliar. You can give your self time to honor the new you and get to know this new version of yourself. You can pour on the self-care and love like a cocoon that protects you during the time of transition. Then one day you will realize this is the new you. You will feel grounded and solid again until the next time you reach a new place on your mountain of growth.
The best way I’ve known to manage and minimize the shakiness is to create a story you can step into and get familiar with. If you are ready to create the bigger story you’d like to start living schedule a strategy session with me below.